It occurs to me after some years working with the Thirteen Repentances of Pistis Sophia that this cycle modulates in at least two ways: her condition as a victim of the Self-Willed Triple power, and the condition of the Self-Willed Triple Power. In this post, I'll focus on the former, remembering that 'confesssion' is simply admitting what hurts and 'repentance' is doing something--anything--differently.
Essentially, from the First Repentance, she appears to lament and cry out about her condition and by the Thirteenth Repentance, she is claiming full responsibility for her condition. What this has to teach of repentance and confession is immense for all of us who find ourselves in a painfully dark cycle in our mystical journey--our light power 'seized' from us--and how it is dissolved and transformed by awareness.
I quote from various portions to sketch a picture of the subtle shifts and modulations in tone throughout her repentances for your consideration:
First Repentance: "2 I looked, O Light into the parts below and there I beheld a light. And I thought: I will go into that region, so that I may obtain that light. And so I went, and I found myself in the darkness of Chaos below, and no longer could I proceed upward and return to my region, for I was beset by all the emanations of Self-Willed, and the lion-faced power seized the light that was within me. [...] 7 For it is by your initiative and for sake of your Light that I am fallen into this distress, and I am covered with shame."
Second Repentance: "10 For the emanations of the Self-Willed have enticed me, and they have taken all my Light-power. They have wanted to possess all my Light completely and triumph over me my power, 11 saying to one another, ‘The Light has abandoned her, let us descend on her and seize all the Light in her.’"
Fourth Repentance: "10 It is by your command and by your order, O Light, that these things have happened to me, and it is by your decrees that I am here. 11 Your command has brought me low, and like a power of the Chaos I have sunk, and my own power in me is paralyzed. 12 But you, O Adonai, are Eternal Light, and attend on all who are ever oppressed.
Fifth Repentance: "7 You have brought upon me your commandment and all things which you have ordained. 8 And your Spirit has retreated and forsaken me. Furthermore, by your commandment the emanations of my aeon have not come to my assistance, but have loathed me and kept themselves away from me, and still I am not completely annihilated. 9 But my Light is weakened within me, and I have cried out to the Light with all the Light remaining in me, and I have stretched out my hands to you."
Sixth Repentance: "6 Let all the powers within me have confidence in the Light when I am in the darkness below, and may they again have confidence in the Light if they return to the region of the Height. 7 For the Light has compassion towards us and delivers us; a great mystery of salvation is within in."
Seventh Repentance: "7 Concerning my transgression, which from the beginning I have committed in my ignorance, do not mark it against me, O Light, but rather save me through your great mystery of the forgiveness of sins, for the sake of your goodness, O Light."
Ninth Repentance: "1 O Light, strike down those who have taken my power from me, and seize the power of those who have seized mine. 2 For I am your power and your Light; come and save me."
Eleventh Repentance: "3 I chose to descend into the Chaos instead of remaining in the thirteenth aeon, the region of Righteousness."
Is anyone else seeing what I'm seeing? The changes throughout these repentances ARE the shifts of her taking responsibility for her own energy, her own vulnerability, her own distraction from adoring the True Light.
Far from 'blaming' her for her fall, which teaches us nothing, I'm inquiring into the exact opposite, how repenting of a choice, a decision, a willful act which, even in ignorance, is the resolution and dissolution of 'victim karma'. If I am ever the victim of another's words or deeds, my experience cannot change and will be ever-defined by my perpetrator: I and my violator become two inseparable halves of one karmic exchange. If, on the other hand, I confess the pain of my experience to the Holy One and wait confidently on the Light Presence and Light Power, I come to the empowerment of repentance: Taking full responsibility for my part in the painful, karmic knot. When I take responsibility for how I ever put myself in such a circumstance, my part dissolves and releases me from the accuser, the victimizer, the perpetrator, who is no longer 'mine'.
"I chose to descend into the Chaos." This is the all-empowering repentance and liberation of Pistis Sophia. Now the full-awareness of her Logos-pair, her Twin, may complete her understanding. In us, this same Logos-pair abides, who is our new understanding from a murky experience. Understanding liberates.
May all who truly seek liberation from a karmic exchange be empowered by confession and repentance, taking their light power back with awareness.